yesterday was the day of coney island, the cyclone, astroland, and extra large beers. i still have the nifty temp tat won playing skeeball. the weather was perfect and the people watching was at unheard of levels. i love fried dough.

today of all days

i'm currently in one of those moods where i might as well be a two year old. good thing i'm the only one here at work because before i could possibly catch myself i would whine. maybe do a little stomping dance. fists tight and shaking in front of my body. logic, reason and sense completely gone. i hear those don't go over well in academic environments.

and what to have for dinner? that is the truly pressing question. when i get home will i have a plan. since i've spent all my spending money for the next two weeks in this past weekend there's no more stopping by whole foods on the way home from work. the poor people on the train won't have me to gawk at while i shovel indian food in as fast as i can.

at lunch i was reading this slate.com article about montessori schools and realized yet again that kids are a huge hassle. i mean, i'll probably have them. one look at my breasts and i'm shocked they haven't just started lactating of their own accord, baby present or not. i think kids are okay in theory and in the immediate community but as soon as you scale back to world dynamics and issues i wish i were barren. i guess i just don't hold the opinion that my offspring would save the world, or that more is better, do there need to be more of us? whatever. the whole child debate was stirred this weekend when i went to a friend's bridal shower. next thing will be a baby shower, maybe not this year but the year after for sure. so many people are on track with their lives. of which i have no desire to join them, i just don't like to be surrounded by tracks.

tomorrow i have to remember to stop by the fish pond and see how big the tadpoles have gotten.

working from home

today is the second day this week i've worked from home. sitting around, clad only in underwear, computer in lap. i was here when the mail came and the new netflix is now on for background noise. over analytical rambling that is meant to be prolific but is instead painful to listen to. that is kicking and screaming. but i am now just reminded again that i need a passport. number one on the list, the list i need to write down.

yesterday a 1GB SD card arrived, for the new digital camera that has yet to arrive. i love that they come in separate packages. the largest box for this tiny card. at least baby kitty has one more box to sleep in. poor annoying baby kitty.

nothing truly exciting ever happens.

today i'm working from home. why you ask? because i can. that and i really need to do laundry. the new place i've been patiently awaiting to open has! yay! i now only have to walk 1/2 a block to do laundry instead of 3.

so what else has been going on with me? well, i went up to lake george over the weekend and it was fantastic. beautiful. some pictures would illustrate that very well... too bad for the lack of a digital camera. which brings me to my current little dilemma. my uncle bought me a camera. a digital one. and it came and he said it wasn't that great and that he'd overpaid for it. and he had. so then i'm a little brat and ask if it can be returned because the camera that i wanted actually costs less and is much cooler. so now i'm feeling like a complete asshole and maybe i am one...

but once everything works itself out and i either have this camera or another camera then there will be pictures and this will less have to be my writing and can more be a visual interpretation. not bad, right??

finished my second week at lamont! think things are going well but there is still a huge cavern of knowledge untapped. i need to review the basics of geology, physics, and mathematics. maybe read some of the published papers of my phd holdin' coworkers. oh and figure out what i need to know to have a better chance of going to sea.

two days ago i sat next to a man with two thumbs on his right hand. weirdest thing i've seen in quite some time. but i guess with 8million people there's some of everything.

oh and i'm convinced that i have social anxiety disorder or some variation there of. it'd explain a lot.

at 12:36 i have finally made it home and taken a quick shower. the sky keeps lighting it's purplish blinding light as we are in the middle of a storm. i have to leave for work in less than six hours. i am more of a twelve hour sleeper generally.

today i wish i were able to switch off the repeat in my brain. it's always the small things, said and probably not lingering with anyone else that i for hours later berate myself over. like today. not fully ingesting that scott said he was a postdoc, key word being post, i asked what his topic was, if he had chosen one yet. it probably've been more relevant to ask when he'd finished and if he was continuing his research or teaching. i know it doesn't matter but it's been haunting me since. i hate feeling foolish. but i have labored on that one what feels too long and told two people even, must get over that. too many other things to replay.