today of all days

i'm currently in one of those moods where i might as well be a two year old. good thing i'm the only one here at work because before i could possibly catch myself i would whine. maybe do a little stomping dance. fists tight and shaking in front of my body. logic, reason and sense completely gone. i hear those don't go over well in academic environments.

and what to have for dinner? that is the truly pressing question. when i get home will i have a plan. since i've spent all my spending money for the next two weeks in this past weekend there's no more stopping by whole foods on the way home from work. the poor people on the train won't have me to gawk at while i shovel indian food in as fast as i can.

at lunch i was reading this slate.com article about montessori schools and realized yet again that kids are a huge hassle. i mean, i'll probably have them. one look at my breasts and i'm shocked they haven't just started lactating of their own accord, baby present or not. i think kids are okay in theory and in the immediate community but as soon as you scale back to world dynamics and issues i wish i were barren. i guess i just don't hold the opinion that my offspring would save the world, or that more is better, do there need to be more of us? whatever. the whole child debate was stirred this weekend when i went to a friend's bridal shower. next thing will be a baby shower, maybe not this year but the year after for sure. so many people are on track with their lives. of which i have no desire to join them, i just don't like to be surrounded by tracks.

tomorrow i have to remember to stop by the fish pond and see how big the tadpoles have gotten.